Do You Feel Supported?

Sent by Lauren Jane Heller    |    April 13, 2021

There is something magical that happens when I feel emotionally and energetically held by others. I’m suddenly able to tune into what’s really going on with me. I feel safe to explore the darkness and the light, to feel all the feelings, to be with what’s here, with what I’ve been afraid to acknowledge. I feel seen… and the fear melts away. Or if it stays, the texture is different. It feels more like anticipation, like excitement: there is so much unknown, so much I can’t control and yet here I am, being honest with myself, doing what feels right, and feeling safe because I’m supported by others. 

This is the depth of exploration —the kind of safety— that I’m committed to creating for others. I feel so privileged that I get to do this work: that I can enable those around me to feel the glow of what’s really present deep inside, the molten core, the golden ember of their true selves. That I can help others to learn to release their power, chip away the layers of survival mechanisms and fear, pretence and “safe” behaviours, and begin to live the abundant, successful, joyful, love-filled lives they secretly or not-so-secretly long for is a marvel to me every day. 

This week has been an unreal illustration of just that. I took on a challenge from my coach — to offer 50 deep, powerful conversations to anyone who wants my support. Within a few hours, I had dozens of requests. Within days I had filled more than half of the spots. Now I'm just a few away from the 50 spots booked. 

The sessions began...and I feel so much gratitude. I feel grateful that I can support others in their learning and self-knowing. I feel gratitude for all the learning and self-knowing that’s available for me. Even more deeply, I feel grateful for the trust and vulnerability and commitment involved in speaking with a stranger or acquaintance because you know there’s something missing, something you’re afraid of, something you need support with that you can’t figure out on your own. 

Without disclosing anything about the sessions, the themes that emerged were the human struggles: the fear of getting it wrong, the fear of not being taken seriously, fear of not being as good as you hope, fear of being stuck in something you don’t love. The desires for security, for control, for approval — whether it’s from peers or family or self. 

What this week reminded me of more than anything else is that while it’s easy to feel alone and disconnected, like our problems are unique and so personal and intense, that really, under it all, we’re the same. We all have stories about how things should or shouldn’t be that we allow to ignite big emotions in us. We all want things we don’t believe we can have because of obstacles we create in our minds. We all have the ability to dive into or to let go of drama. 

Most people choose the former. It’s certainly easier to go on blaming others, competing to be the biggest victim, waiting for someone else to guide us, to give us permission or tell us what to do. But if you want to live a beautiful, abundant, brave, successful life, my hope is that you choose to get the support. I did and I do.

We’re none of us alone unless we make it so. My hope is that by offering these conversations, a few more people will recognize just how easy it is to get supported and step into creating their lives from a place of commitment and love rather than fear and scarcity. 

So here’s my challenge to you: if you’re struggling or simply know there's more that you're capable of, get support. You’re not alone.

It's worth it. I know.